Tag Archives: Bent

Start your engines!

Last year I wrote a blog post about speed writing. I’ve never been a particularly fast writer (it took me eighteen months to draft my first novel, Bent), and it’s been an ongoing struggle for me to quit editing so much as I write. Without even realizing it, my right-hand middle finger darts up to the delete button, flipping me off (and cackling maniacally, I imagine) as it erases the offending word, phrase, or sentence I just wrote. It’s as if that finger has a mind of its own, as if it thinks it’s better than me. I try to keep the little bastard on a short leash, but as soon as I relax my guard, there it goes again, running off to undo all the hard work I just did.

middle finger

What’s the big deal with editing as you write, you might ask? For some, I’m sure, it works just fine, but I’ve come to the conclusion that writing slowly – that nitpicking every last word – is akin to committing inspirational suicide. In the few seconds it takes me to correct a typo or rephrase something I just wrote, my train of thought careens off the tracks, coming to a shuddering halt. Sure, another train will come thundering by eventually, but who knows when that will be? Seconds, perhaps, or maybe a few long minutes as I sit staring at my monitor, the blinking cursor reminding me that whatever groove I was in has vanished…maybe for good.

Train of Thought

Writing Bent, my quota was 350 words (about 1 typeset page) per day. I had good days when I’d pump out double or triple that amount, but I also had bad days when I was lucky to hit triple digits. In the end I finished the book, but sometimes I wonder how many great ideas I lost because I was simply too busy backspacing to allow my imagination free rein. Lots, I’m sure, which is a damn shame.

After many months trying to train myself to let go and just write, I finally acknowledged that perhaps I needed some help. Thus, while perusing a number of books on the topic, I stumbled upon Alan Watt’s The 90-Day Novel. An award-winning fiction writer and founder of LA Writers Lab, Watt has compiled a guide for writers who have stories to tell, but who get bogged down in the process of telling them. Through a series of daily stream-of-consciousness exercises, Watt teaches you to inquire into the world of your story, to explore your characters and their motivations while “holding it all loosely” so as not to choke the life from it. He advocates trusting your instincts, giving yourself permission to write poorly [while drafting], and remembering that there are absolutely no wrong answers here. This is your story.

I’m thrilled to report that in the thirteen days I’ve been following this program, I’ve written 40k words. (By way of comparison, it took me six months to hit that mark while writing Bent.) Are they pretty? No. Lyrical? Uh uh. Ready to hit the presses? Definitely not. But you know what? I don’t care! I’m writing! I’m allowing inspiration to flow freely from my fingertips, and most of the time I can barely keep up as the ideas pour out. And since I’m holding it all loosely instead of trying to force it, I’m discovering new possibilities I hadn’t previously considered. My characters have come to life in a really exciting way, and have essentially begun telling their own story. I don’t worry if I’m not sure what happens next; I trust that together, my characters and I will figure it out.

Formula One World Championship

I’ve been writing seriously for three and a half years and for the most part, have loved every minute of it. The past two weeks, though, have been especially fun and I’m hopeful that, with Watt’s guidance, I’ve turned a new leaf. If I keep writing at this pace, I’ll finish drafting my second novel, Time Lapse, late this summer. My engine is revved and I’ve got my eyes on the finish line.

Here we go!


Year of the Horse

I’ve never been a big “what’s your sign” astrology subscriber. I don’t believe in fate and find no comfort in the thought that our destinies are all preordained. I don’t like the idea that I have no agency, no real control to steer my life as I see fit. I prefer the notion that anything could happen at any time, that today might be the day that chance and circumstance – and a little hard work – conspire to open new, fantastic doors. To me it’s reassuring to know that tomorrow, everything could change.

In the waning days of 2013, I decided that 2014 was going to be a great year. Maybe that sounds arrogant. I don’t intend it to, and I’m not delusional: I know this doesn’t mean every day will be a magical joyride or that bad things won’t happen. What it does mean, though, is that I’m going to focus all my effort on making good things happen, on extracting the most value possible from this year of my life. Luck, chance, and timing will play their part, sure, but I intend to do everything within my power to help them along.

 2014-Horse

According to the Chinese zodiac, 2014 is the year of the horse. I find this particularly interesting because 1978 – the year I was born – was also a year of the horse. Fitting, then, that I’ve chosen this year to reinvent myself, to make something of this dream I’ve been nurturing for the past three years, to witness myself reborn as a writer. This is the year when, instead of thinking of myself as an aspiring writer, I will begin thinking of myself as a real writer with real stories to tell. Stories that I love creating and that I hope you will love reading.

With that, here are a few updates on my current projects:

  • Bent – I finished my first novel last spring and have been searching for an agent to represent me since that time. I’ve received a number of rejections, but also some encouraging feedback. The hunt continues and I’m optimistic that I’ll find someone this year who’s as excited about Bent as I am.
  • Time Lapse – After overcoming some challenges with the story line in December, I’m making good progress on my second novel. I have a clear (yet flexible) outline to guide me as I work through the back half of the story towards an ending which I hope will be both unexpected and unforgettable.
  • Short stories
    • The Day I Learned to Fly – My debut short about a man who believes the key to happiness is flight. Currently on submission to a handful of literary magazines.
    • The Unrapture – A collaborative venture with my friend, Dan Preston, The Unrapture asks what might happen if only the faithless are saved. Currently in progress and, when complete, I’ll submit to a select list of sci fi publications.

Last but not least, I’m very excited about the recent surge of online interest in my work and I’d like to keep the momentum rolling. To this end, I’ve decided to announce a contest! Here are the details:

One lucky winner will be selected to collaborate with me on a short story. This is your opportunity to get in on the ground floor of the creative process, brainstorming plot and characters, helping me shape our concept into a polished final draft. You’ll be credited as a co-writer and will split any profits from publication 50/50. And best of all, one day when my books are tearing up the bestseller charts (fingers crossed…), you’ll be able to impress your friends by saying, “I wrote a story with that guy!”

To enter, all you have to do is help me spread the word about my Facebook author page. Share a link with your family and friends, then send me a quick message to let me know. For every share, your name will be entered in the drawing; the more you share, the greater your chances of winning! The winner will be selected when I reach 500 likes.

Thank you all for your support. For a (yet) unpublished writer, it means everything. It keeps me going on the bad days and motivates me a little more on the good. Together, let’s grab the reins and make 2014 one hell of a year!

Evan


Multitasking

When it comes to writing, I’ve never been much for multitasking. Just ask Marta. If inspiration is flowing, if I’m in the groove, it’s best to leave me alone until my thoughts play out and I find a good stopping point.

With this in mind, I now find myself contending with an unfamiliar challenge: managing multiple writing projects at the same time. While writing and revising Bent, that was my one and only focus; I was 100% invested in that one project and had no distractions. It was the same when I was preparing and sending my initial round of submission material early last spring. And with no diversions, I worked efficiently and purposefully, moving forward in a measured way each day.

Then, in April, I started writing Time Lapse. Suddenly I had two irons in the fire for the first time, and now, on top of writing my new story and building my online platform, I’m trying to find time to work on query letter and manuscript revisions for Bent, as well. So far, I’ve really struggled with this juggling act. I don’t want to stop working on Time Lapse in order to go back to Bent, but I know I need to get back into Bent in the interest of tightening things up and resolving some point of view issues before I send out more submissions.

I’ve been giving some thought to the notion of setting aside specific times to work on each project, and this is what I’ve come up with: my commute on the train will be devoted to Time Lapse, lunch breaks to Bent, and evenings to my online activity. Hopefully with this schedule, I can move forward in that same efficient, purposeful manner I applied to my initial project while avoiding the gnawing anxiety I’ve been feeling as a result of neglecting two projects in order to focus all of my efforts on just one. After all, Time Lapse is a long way from being finished and in the meantime, I really want to continue querying Bent with the goal of publishing my first book!

Let’s see if I can become a multitasking master!


Back in the Saddle

It’s been a few months since I’ve posted, but I hope my *extensive* readership will forgive me. Between marrying the love of my life, spiriting off on a glorious two-week honeymoon spanning the exotic (Costa Rica) and the familiar (Ludington, MI.), as well as the work I’ve been doing on my second book, Time Lapse, I’ve had a full docket.

Reflecting on my earlier post, “New story, new quota,” I must humbly confess that I have not been keeping pace with my 700 words/day goal. That said, I’m currently sitting at the 22k word mark (approximately 63 pages) and am feeling confident about where the story is heading. I’ve known since June 2011 how this story would begin and end, but had NO idea what would happen in between. That seems to be coming together nicely, and it never ceases to amaze me when some aspect of plot, character, or scene seems to magically distill itself in my brain, waiting to be transferred to the blank page. Where does this inspiration come from? I’m not sure I know, but what I DO know is that it’s a lot of fun (and sometimes also quite maddening) to figure this stuff out. And when something falls into place like this, it’s extremely satisfying.

I’m also pleased to report that I’ve once again begun submitting queries for Bent after a fairly lengthy break. Other than one query I sent out in June (which was rejected almost immediately), this week witnessed my first submissions since late March. Between identifying agents, researching them online to see if they’d be a good fit, customizing my query letter for their consideration, then waiting, waiting, and waiting some more, querying is tedious work. Actually, it’s a bit of a drag, especially considering many agents advise a response time of four to eight weeks, IF they respond at all. I will say, though, that it feels good knowing I have four fresh queries out there. It’s a little like Christmas each time I open my e-mail, wondering if today will be the day I get a positive reply. I plan to continue sending queries out at a rate of four or more per week to meet my goal of querying fifty agents by October 1.

One last reflection before I wrap up this post: I am not the most patient person you know. Surprise! While I’ve mellowed somewhat in my “old age,” waiting is still a challenge for me. I find it curious, then, that I’ve chosen to pursue this path; that I’ve undertaken to write books, which in itself is a painstakingly slow and laborious process even before considering the complicated and at times daunting task of getting published. It’s been thirty months since the idea for Bent hit me, and I’m still going strong, undeterred, undiscouraged, and unbelievably excited to call myself a writer even if I have not (yet) been paid for my work.

Thanks for standing with me on this journey. Your support means everything!

ETH


Speed Writing

I am not a speedy writer. Well, let me qualify. Ideas come quickly most of the time, but in transposing them from brain to paper, I bog myself down with questions: Can I word this better? Is this clear? What does this scene really look like? Would this character really say that? This tendency, I believe, originally stemmed from my previously-mentioned fear of revising. Now that I know not to fear revision, though, I see another cause: I feel that if I don’t nail a scene/character/conversation/etc. the first time around, I’ll be building everything that follows upon an unstable foundation. Makes sense, right?

The problem with this line of thinking, however, is twofold. First, while I allow myself to be preoccupied with minute details, the story languishes in the deep recesses of my mind. I home in on one little thing – how does this room look, for example – while ignoring the big picture – what’s happening in this room? Of course I eventually get to the ‘what,’ but sometimes I’ve waited so long that the creative spark has fizzled and then it feels more like pulling teeth than writing.

That brings up the second issue: the longer I toil on a particular scene, the more questions I start asking myself. Don’t get me wrong – questions (and their solutions) are good. But questioning too much breeds self-doubt, and that’s one of the most insidious and omnipresent dangers a writer faces. Second-guessing can drag you to a halt. I remember reading something (can’t remember where now) by an author (can’t remember who) that said (and I’m paraphrasing): “I write as fast as I can to outrun doubt.”

I really tried to spur myself along as I wrote Bent, but despite my best efforts, I still found myself rereading, tweaking, polishing as I went. This was gratifying in some ways, maddening in others. I wonder now how many brilliant ideas flitted right out of head while I was busy correcting a grammar mistake or eliminating a word I’d repeated in the same paragraph – fixes that easily could have been completed during the revision phase rather than the composition phase.

So now, I’m about 3,000 words into Time Lapse, and I really am trying to write differently this time, just to see what happens. It’s not easy to change the way I’ve always written and the method that witnessed the completion of my first book, but I want to give it a try. I want to see if I can outrun doubt and get my vision down on paper before I dress it up and send it out into the world. Maybe I’ll be surprised at the result. Maybe I’ll find that inspiration flows more readily when I don’t try to bottle it right away, but instead let it shoot right out of my brain like some mental fire hose.

Stay tuned.

ETH


Dealing with rejection

Rejection stings. As if anyone who survived middle school needs to be told…

Rationally I understand I’m going to have to kiss a lot of frogs before finding my (publishing) prince, but it’s still a drag when someone says “thanks but no thanks” to the story I spent nearly two years crafting. It’s awfully hard not to take it personally, to start questioning my work as well as my dream. Just remember, I tell myself, NO story appeals to everyone. You just need to knock on the right door, find the right person. It’s true, I know, but patience is not one of my virtues.

So on I trudge, doing my best to keep chin up, spirits high, and optimism flowing. Someone will like this book of mine!

ETH


Checking in after a long absence

Two years have flown by so fast it’s scary.

I completed the draft of my first novel – a sci/fi thriller called Bent – last fall. Writing it, while incredibly gratifying, was probably the most difficult thing I’ve ever done. The writing, itself, wasn’t hard. That’s not to say I didn’t toil over some scenes until my eyes went blurry, but the true challenge was sustaining my spirits over the course of the eighteen months it took to complete. Some days I was awash with confidence, certain that I was penning the next chart-topper. Other days I knew without a doubt that whatever drivel I’d managed to spout up to that point would never see the light of day, consigned to some literary purgatory far, far from any eager readers. The highs were great; the lows excruciating.

Yet on I wrote, one word after another, weaving sentences into paragraphs, pages into chapters, until, at last, on September 7, I wrote the final two words every author longs to see at the bottom of the page: the end.

After letting it marinate for a month (thanks for that suggestion, Stephen King!), I began revising. Those who know me are aware that I harbor an irrational fear of the revision process, dating back to high school when I was required to chop a twenty-page paper to ten – the most difficult writing assignment I ever undertook (until Bent, of course). Consequently, I wrote my draft with painstaking slowness, hoping that I was nailing every word so that I wouldn’t have to revise a thing. Yeah, that didn’t work.

To my surprise, I really enjoyed revising, and I can laugh now when I remember how frightened I was to begin. Between October and December, I chopped nearly 25k words (of the original 130k) from the draft while cleaning, polishing, and reworking the parts that remained. Just before Christmas, satisfied that I’d whipped it into shape, I printed five copies for my first beta readers. Up until that point, no one had read a word. Nerve-wracking!

Initial response has been very positive. I’ve fielded a number of helpful criticisms, some of which I implemented, some of which I filed away as “that’s interesting, but I don’t think I’m going to use it.” For the most part, I just wanted to know whether the story was entertaining and the characters believable. From the feedback I received, the answer is yes.

In January I began working on my query letter (for those who aren’t familiar, this is a one-page pitch to literary agents consisting of a high-level synopsis of the story, an introduction to me as the author, and an explanation of why I’m contacting that specific agent for representation). I soon discovered that this little one-page letter was, in many ways, more difficult to write than the book itself. When you have 350 pages to make an impression, there’s not nearly as much pressure to make each and every word pop as there is when you’ve got one lonely page to sell yourself and your work. I joined an online forum and got some great feedback which helped me hone my query into a sharp little missile of self-promotion, then began sending it out.

Just when I thought I’d jumped through the last hoop, I discovered that many agents also request a detailed plot synopsis (yeah, try condensing an entire novel into a page or two while maintaining narrative voice) and author bio. Back to the drawing board I went and produced these two additional submission samples.

I’ve now queried nine agents, received three rejections and one request for a partial manuscript for further review. Upon receiving the first rejection, I could scarcely contain my excitement. Many agents have a “if we’re not interested, we won’t reply” statement on their websites, so the fact that someone took the time to write back and say “thanks but no thanks” was incredibly validating. I’d been noticed! You can imagine how excited I was when an agent e-mailed me to tell me how intriguing my premise was, asking to see more. So the waiting game continues. Nothing moves particularly fast in this business and I’m just going to have to deal with that. But damn it, I want to know! Meanwhile, I’m continuing to search for agents and sending out additional submissions. After all, John Grisham received something like 28 rejections for A Time to Kill before someone finally bit. And J.K. Rowling only made it when an agent’s daughter picked up the manuscript he’d brought home, read the first three chapters, and promptly asked for the rest. You just never know when lightning will strike.

And last week, I began my next project, another sci-fi/thriller tentatively called Time Lapse. Regardless of what happens with Bent, I’m moving forward, pursuing my passion. What more can I ask for?

I intend to make regular updates to this blog now, describing my progress, thoughts, and challenges as I write Time Lapse while also tracking my attempt to publish Bent. I hope you find this interesting and will follow along with me. Please feel free to share this link, too, with anyone you believe might enjoy it.

Off I go!

ETH